Sheena Easton, “Sugar Walls”

No, frankly, this Scottish lass has never been that talented. But she’s got just enough personality (and not an iota more) to pull off a record as delectably smutty as “Sugar Walls,” written for her by Mr. 1984, Prince. Really, the success of this record comes down to three things:

1. It’s dirty without being dirrty.

2. It, surprisingly, doesn’t sound like a Prince record.

Hell, I forgot the third thing, because I started listening to Sheila E.’s “The Glamorous Life” – a far more interesting record, one of the finest singles put forth in the ‘80s – and stopped caring about Sheena’s vagina.

[I’m on an ’80s R&B/pop kick today, or can you tell?]